Meditation for mothers in 5 minutes a day.

I am going to cut to the chase with this one. You are a busy Mum. You have 5 minutes and a sneaking suspicion this meditation stuff might actually be good for you. Meditation for mums doesn’t need to be complicated. Who needs more complication anyway?

Let’s get you meditating in 6 easy steps. No candles, chanting or yoga mat required. Just answer one quick question for me first. What has put you off meditation in the past? (drop me a message below).

Step 1. Find a comfortable place to sit down.

No, you don’t need a full lotus position (seriously, who can actually bend like that). Just sit somewhere that’s comfortable for you. I try to avoid lying down because I am a mum and if I lie down I’m asleep, you understand. I personally like to sit crossed legged, propped with two cushions under me. You can try sitting on a chair (legs uncrossed, feet on the floor) or even sitting on the stairs can be really good if you are a little tight in the hips.

Step 2. Set your time.

At first, it is a really good idea to set a time. Otherwise, you will find yourself peeking at the phone every few minutes. I use the Calm app which has great guided meditations for starting out and also a timer for silent meditations. Otherwise just set a time (with a gentle bell at the end) on your phone.

Step 3. Sit up tall but relaxed.

No slouching but no rigid spine. Think relaxed but alert. Simple.

Step 4. Close your eyes.

Erm, no explanation needed.

Step 5. Follow your breath.

Now you are getting to the good stuff. Follow your breath all the way in, pause, then follow it all the way out. It takes a few breaths to quiet your head. Just keep following. I like to imagine a sparkly light moving up and down my windpipe. You can also say the words (in your head), “breathing in, breathing out” or try counting 1 for in 2 for out.

Step 6. When you notice your mind has wandered, just come back.

The first time I meditated, I caught myself thinking about a thousand times in 5 minutes. Seriously. The term “monkey mind” could have been created for me but that’s the beauty of meditation. There is no “right way” to do it. Noticing and then coming back to the breath IS MEDITATION. The act of noticing, gently coming back and starting again. This builds your mindful awareness muscle.

Step 6. Repeat daily.

Ok, here is the real sticking point. You need to commit to this little act of self-care, every day. I am not saying just throw in the towel if you miss a day, I still miss an occasional day. The key is to just find a little space, 5 or 10 minutes you can use every day and stick with it. Change happens through daily small steps. Just like taking one short run isn’t going to turn you into Paula Radcliffe, one meditation every few weeks won’t have an impact on your head. Sorry.

That’s your 6 steps. Can I give you a few other pointers from a mum who has been “trying” to meditate and quiet her head for close to 20 years now? You will get annoyed. You will probably find your head goes into overdrive when you first try to meditate (a quiet space tends to do that to us). You will notice yourself planning out the next 7 days of activities). This is all fine and totally normal.

If you are going through a really anxious time, meditation can feel like a scary place. When I was going through the worst of my Postnatal depression, I literally could not sit still and go into my head. It was too much. At that time I tried Tai Chi or Qi Gong, these practices can both be used as a moving meditation and you might find them easier when meditation is just too hard.

Go out my lovely mumma’s and give your head a mini spa break, I promise she will be grateful and the best bit? Your mindful journey is just starting, pretty soon you will find yourself being more present with your kids, noticing life around you and finding you don’t have to be controlled by your thoughts. Meditation for mums is something I love to talk about. I am so excited to share this with you.

Meditation practice isn’t about trying to throw ourselves away and become something better, it’s about befriending who we are.

Pema Chodron

Here with you.

Amanda x